Hundreds of Villanova students walk into the St. Augustine Center, known as SAC to most, for their Augustine and Culture Seminar (ACS) class every day. Every day those same students see the painting of Augustine the Rhetor, created by artist and Professor Edward Ruscil. The painting features a seemingly exhausted young Augustine at his desk beside a dark window.  Along with him are a bust of Plato, various books, and a slate with the Latin words “I had become a great enigma to myself" (from Confessions 4.4.7).

     The shell and darkness represent themes from Augustine's life before his conversion. The shell recalls the story of Augustine encounting a boy on the beach who was trying to fit the ocean into a small hole he had dug.  To Augustine, this paralleled how no matter how hard you try, you will never reach the level of God. The darkness is symbolic of Augustine’s blindness: it is not until his conversion, that he is able to see the world clearly. The bust of Plato is included in the painting because he was a prominent figure in Augustine’s life and works. We asked Rev. Kail C Ellis, O.S.A., Dean of the College of Liberal Arts and Sciences, what the quotation in the painting means to him. Father Ellis explained, “It is Augustine asking ‘who am I?’ and ‘what is my purpose?’ To find the answer to this question, we must look in unlikely places for answers and must not be discouraged.”  Fr. Ellis reminded us that Augustine was not right all the time but was not afraid to search for answers, whether wrong or right.

Augustine the Rhetor in Confessions

                The imagery in this painting of Augustine is deeply rooted in Confessions.  Before his conversion, Augustine has an emptiness inside his heart which he tries to fill with earthly desires. For example, Augustine steals pears just for the sake of sinning.  He says, “I feasted on the sin, nothing else, and that I relished and enjoyed. Even if some morsel of the pears did not enter my mouth, it was only the criminal act that lent it savor” (2.6.12).  As Augustine steals the pears to try to fill his empty heart, so too does he look to his friend for fulfillment.  However, Augustine remains unhappy because the friendship is based on dependency and does not involve God. He says, “I felt that my soul and his had been but one soul in two bodies,” (4.6.11). Augustine depends so much on his friend that when his friend dies, he is overcome with grief and believes he cannot continue to live. It is at this period that he describes himself as a "great enigma" to himself. He cannot yet understand how to reach happiness and continues to search for it in earthly goods.  His job as a teacher of rhetoric, for example, is merely to advance his status and make money, even though he does truly love rhetoric. Through this portion of his life, Augustine wants to turn towards God and change his ways, but he cannot because he thinks reactively. He does not take the time reflect thoroughly, thus he fails to make sound decisions. Instead, Augustine's actions are rash; had he thought about his actions and desires he may have realized that giving up his bodily pleasures and turning towards God would have reaped many more rewards in the long run.  

Augustine in Our Lives

      We asked Charlotte Thurston, an English and Honors major at Villanova University, what she thought of the quote, “I was an enigma to myself.”  She suggested that “because people are busy and don’t have the time to sit down to ‘tolle lege’ or to reflect, students remain enigmas to themselves.”  Indeed, as she explained, many students today at Villanova University are enigmas because they are constantly involved in activities or doing work and do not have enough time to reflect.  It is easy to be an enigma to yourself when your life is so chaotic. Students have to attend classes for which they are expected to write papers and do homework assignments and sometimes even go to interviews or lectures. They worry about their grades and whether they will maintain a good GPA, because that will eventually lead to a good job. Students also do not take the time to reflect upon themselves because socializing and partying may distract them, as well.

      If students do not have the time to reflect upon themselves they cannot get anything out of all the activities which they join. One initiative at Villanova University to help students reflect is the ACS program.  ACS presents students with texts and helps them understand the texts more deeply. While some students do not appreciate being required to take the course, it can foster their understanding of not only historic and relevant texts, but also of themselves, as students and people. The seminar encourages them to discuss their ideas and form arguments in class. This program helps a student become less of an enigma.  Throughout this website, we will explore some of the ideas that students explore in their ACS class, and how those ideas are represented in some of the art and imagery on campus.